Getting to the Last Page: Part 3

My brother-in-law’s wife apparently has a habit when it comes to reading books—a habit that really only applies to fiction and not non-fiction, but a habit I’ll likely never emulate all the same: she reads the last page first. I suppose that’s one way of making sure that you get to the last page and of alleviating the suspense about how the story is going to work out. I guess it helps in case something happens and for some reason you aren’t able to read all those pages between the beginning and end—you can, with relief, say, “Ah, but at least I know how it all turns out!” But I don’t do this, and not only because I rarely read fiction.

My problem is different. You see, I have a lot of books. And many of them I have started reading. And many of them I have not finished reading. And since most of them are non-fiction, skipping to the last page for a glance wouldn’t help me much. But because I end up putting books aside, forgetting about them, and not finishing them, it’s always something of a triumph when I actually manage to get to the last page.

That’s why I can say I have been victorious and triumphant over the last several weeks. I have actually read and completed a number of books: A.W. Tozer’s The Knowledge of the Holy, Timothy Keller’s The Reason for God: Belief in an Age of Skepticism, Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz: Non-Religious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality and his Searching for God Knows What, and Henri J.M. Nouwen’s The Living Reminder: Service and Prayer in Memory of Jesus Christ. Each of these authors is very different from one another. And I have appreciated, enjoyed, learned from, and been moved by them all in one way or another.

This time, however, rather than my problem being not finishing a book it might have been plowing through the book to make sure I do get to the last page. Sometimes I have the tendency to keep reading rather than stopping and taking time to reflect on what I have just read.

One example: last night after posting on discovering Nouwen’s The Living Reminder, I finished it. Now, granted, it was a thin book, easy to read in an evening. But easy to read doesn’t mean easy to digest or process. And his reflections on ministry certainly warrant more prayerful reflection (and at a future date I will share some of what he says).

Particularly when reading authors who are reflecting on the Christian life, theologically or pastorally or personally, I feel as though I am in the company of spiritual companions. And depending on the author, I may also feel as though this author is very nearly a pastor to me, a guide on how to listen more attentively to God’s voice in my life.

But for such a thing to happen, ideally, we have to digest what these authors tell us. Truth takes time to absorb. Books involve us in a spiritual conversation and our taking time to think about what we’ve read—something not always easy to do or something we’re inclined to do—becomes our half of the dialogue.

I confess that sometimes I feel guilty after reading a book, because even though while I was in the process of reading it so moved me or helped me I find I can’t remember specific quotations and would struggle to convey what it said to someone else. Often in trying to get across the meaning or impact of what I’ve read to someone else, it comes out drained of colour and lacking in the very qualities that engaged me in the first place. That makes me wonder whether I’ve really read it after all, if you get my meaning. And this is why I have the habit of reading paragraphs, sections, and sometimes whole chapters of books to my wife—I want to share what it says, but I want to do that without getting in the way. My wife is often, but not always, very accommodating about this.

All that said, I do hope that even if I can’t remember specific quotes from a good book and can’t always convey very well what it says in my own words, that somehow the simple act of reading it has changed me and formed me. That is, just like having a conversation with a friend can make you feel loved and understood—more human—even if you don’t remember all the details of the conversation, the important thing is that you had the conversation, that you sat across from one another at Tim’s; so here.

Anyway, already I want to go back with some of these books and be more intentional about gleaning wisdom from them by reflecting on them. With Nouwen’s book, I intentionally underlined here and there. This is also a good way to make a book a conversation partner. I suppose this would help me to slow down and digest a little more. And it occurs to me that rushing through a book that deserves more careful attention is not unlike trying to rush through a conversation with a person who deserves our attention. We gain more by not rushing to the last page.

Getting to the Last Page: Part 2

In one of my recent posts I said, “I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my own relationship with God and about how hard it is sometimes to give it a lot of thought or consideration because God is what I do for a living. I don’t intend for that last sentence to sound irreverent, but being a pastor sometimes makes it hard to spend time focusing on your own faith, on your own walk with Christ.”

At the heart of what I was feeling was something of a disconnect that can occur too easily: the separation of ‘professional’ ministry and personal faith. Part of the reason a pastor may experience this is because each week you’re responsible for preaching, organizing a worship service, perhaps preparing music, leading group studies, and visiting; and in the midst of all this—the appointments and events that fill our day-planners—our own relationship with God can end up on the periphery.

I know that I’ve felt this. Life can get pretty busy, and between making sure I fulfill all of my pastoral and family responsibilities my own personal faith can sometimes fall between the cracks. But when this happens, it doesn’t take all that long—but even then perhaps it takes too long!—to realize that something isn’t quite right. Something is askew.

And though all of my vocational responsibilities are getting done, some indefinable quality needed in the midst of fulfilling my vocational calling is missing. That indefinable quality is the one thing that is indispensable: God. And of course God is not a quality, but a person, the Person, the reason why my vocation exists at all. But because he’s not, strictly speaking, visible, we can, unfortunately, ignore him and carry on doing ministry on our own.

Now when I say we can ignore him, I don’t really mean that. Instead, we neglect prayer. We read books other than Scripture. We fail to spend time quietly meditating in his presence. We avoid dealing with our own spiritual life for the sake of the ministry and in doing so we inadvertently impair our ministry; that is, we hinder our own ability to serve others by being reminders of God’s grace and light.

But the fact is that the two cannot be separated; professional ministry and personal faith go hand in hand. It is the dynamic between the two that makes a pastor. I say that, of course, and I believe it, but I am not always the best example of it.

So all of this is going through my head, and in my case I’m trying to find my way back to that balance, and while in my office one day I come across—accidentally?—a book. I was looking for a completely different book, which I never did find. The book whose spine drew my attention was Henri J.M. Nouwen’s The Living Reminder: Service and Prayer in Memory of Jesus Christ. I actually took it off the shelf because I couldn’t read the spine! It’s a thin book, less than a hundred pages, and I once I had it my hands I took a quick glance at the introduction. Here is what I read:

“What are the spiritual resources of ministers? What prevents them from becoming dull, sullen, lukewarm bureaucrats, people who have many projects, plans, and appointments but who have lost their heart somewhere in the midst of their activities? What keeps ministers vital, alive, energetic, and full of zeal? What allows them to preach and teach, counsel and celebrate with a continuing sense of wonder, joy, gratitude, and praise? These are the questions of this book.”

And as soon as my eyes poured over these words, I knew I had to read this book. It was just one of those moments where it felt like what I could have regarded as a coincidence or accident—the plucking off the shelf of a book I wasn’t even looking for—was actually a God moment.

That being the case, I’m reading it in anticipation that God wants to say something to me through these pages. I don’t know precisely what yet and maybe I won’t know right away. I’ll hopefully have more to share later. But right now reading this unassuming little volume feels to me like a small, seemingly insignificant act of obedience. I’m hoping and praying that my reading will bear rich fruit even if my doing so only results in a small nugget of insight or encouragement. That alone is reason enough to get the last page.

Getting to the Last Page: Part 1

My office shelves are well-stocked with many books. Most are books of theology and biblical studies. Many are academic, and quite a number fall somewhere between academic and popular-level reading. I used to buy books much more frequently, unsurprising since I once was but am no longer a university student.

During that period of my life not only did I get the textbooks required for my courses, I also frequented the religion and theology sections of any used bookstores I could find. I would scour the shelves for volumes recommended by professors, for books by authors I was already reading, for tomes that would be financially inaccessible at retail, and for classic works I knew I should have.

In more recent years I have not been as avid a book-buyer. This is partly because of the cost of books, but also because, while I used to buy books in the hopes that one day I might get around to reading them, now I usually only purchase books that I know (or am pretty sure) I will read. That narrows it down considerably. There are books and even book-sets (Barth’s Church Dogmatics being one example) that would look mighty impressive on a bookcase but would likely gather dust rather than get read.

This isn’t counting books I have gotten with every intention of reading but which, after I have begun reading them, have gotten set aside either because of time or forgetfulness or more immediately pressing responsibilities.

So I’m always glad these days when I get books (either myself or as gifts) that I actually manage to finish. I have a few recent examples, one of which I’ll mention in this post. The first is A.W. Tozer’s The Knowledge of the Holy, which is part theological treatise on God’s attributes and part devotional on God’s attributes.

What I really appreciated about Tozer’s writing is that he really took some very abstract ideas, such as God’s self-existence or transcendence, and personalized them—that is, he makes the connection between the attributes of God and our own relationship with God. This is not a dry theology text, but a meditation on God’s nature that, if read prayerfully and thoughtfully, cannot help but move the heart as well as inform the mind.

Tozer is also intentional about making each chapter (one on each attribute) relatively short, never more than 10 pages each and often between 5 and 6 pages. This makes it ideal for reading one chapter a day along with your Bible reading. At the beginning of each chapter there is also a prayer whose theme reflects the attribute examined in that particular chapter. Even in his exposition he sometimes breaks into prayer—not unlike Karl Barth in Prayer, his book on the Lord’s Prayer and the Reformers' interpretation of it.

Another thing I like about Tozer’s book is that in a day and age when in evangelical circles we can sometimes seem too cozy or comfortable in our relationship with God, he communicates effectively the holiness, that is, the otherness, the apart-from-us-ness, of God. And in doing so, any sensitive reader will, at times, be both comforted and convicted, challenged and assured.

And rather than start from our experience and ask, “What does this mean for my relationship with and understanding of God?” he starts with a characteristic of God and asks, “How should this inform my experience and my relationship with God?” God comes first. Who God is shapes our experience and understanding, not the other way around. That this is a basic biblical approach doesn’t stop a lot of believers from relying on their own experience more than what the Bible says about God’s nature and character.

Several times while reading The Knowledge of the Holy I found myself thinking how great a sermon series this would be—and by that I mean, how great would it be just to stand at the pulpit and read Tozer to the congregation. You know a book is at the very least a good book if it’s one you’d like to share with others; you know it’s a great book if you have to find a way to share it with others. Tozer’s book, for me at least, is an example of the latter.

Learning to Avoid Short-hand

In high school I remember taking a course in short-hand. Beyond that, I don’t remember much. I do recall that short-hand consists of a series of odd squiggles and lines and dots that are supposed to represent different letters and words. Learning to use it was supposed to help us take notes more quickly—though I have no memory whatever of actually using what I was learning in this course. So I guess it wasn’t so helpful at all, except perhaps in keeping my GPA nice and steady.

Thinking about it now, I’m sort of glad that I have long forgotten how to use it. I also don’t have any evidence that I actually took the course, no notes filled with tests and quizzes and assignments on short-hand. And again, I’m glad. If I were to find them now, I’d have no way to read those notes shy of re-acquainting myself with short-hand. The notes would be useless to me and indecipherable to anyone else—unless they happened to be adept at this particularly arcane skill. But, honestly, unless you’re in need of some sort of code language to hide secret messages, why would you want to know how to use short-hand?

It strikes me, though, that in our world people use all kinds of short-hand, even if not of the formal sort that I once learned in high school. Being able to use a form of short-hand is basically about being able to say more with less or at least the same with less. It’s a language, a way of communicating without having to have an abundance of explanation. To that extent, it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes it’s helpful to be able to make yourself understood with minimal verbiage or by using mutually understood terms and references that get the point the across between parties that already understand the terms and references.

Often organizations and groups and limited networks of people develop forms of short-hand. This is even true in churches. As Christians we use all kinds of terms and references that are a form of short-hand. (Check this post for instances of this—see what number you come up with!) For instance, we will ask a fellow Christian about a third party, “Is he born again?” or “Is she saved?” This is short-hand for asking if the person has placed their trust in God, asked him to forgive their sins and has entered into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and has confessed him as Lord and Saviour.

As you can easily see, asking if someone is born again or saved is a lot easier than asking if they have placed their trust in God, been forgiven, has entered in a personal relationship with Jesus Christ by confessing him as Lord and Saviour! But even in the longer form of the question, there are terms and references that could be considered a form of short-hand, such as “a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.” What does that mean?

Some of the short-hand in the church is straight out of Scripture and most of it is at least biblically based. It’s a form of quickly summarizing what we believe and what we want to say around people who already have something of a grasp of the in-language. I would never suggest ridding our vocabulary of these terms or our conversation, prayers, sermons, and studies of these references. Especially when it comes to the terms that come right from the Bible, I would argue that we need to retain them. But we do need to realize that as a form of short-hand, using such terms and references thoughtlessly comes with a few difficulties and pitfalls, both for us and for those outside the church.

First, us. One pitfall about such short-hand or in-language is that when using it we often, even in churches, assume we mean the same thing by the same terms. We’ve all heard about the danger involved when we assume something (or at least I assume you have. If not, break down the word into three parts and see what the two parties become who make assumptions in conversation!).

Seriously, this probably happens more than we think. Words carry loads of meaning, even beyond their biblical intention (that is, when they are biblical terms). People bring to the words they use wads of associations and experiences that may or may not be shared with the person they’re talking with over coffee after the church service, colouring the meaning such that, were the persons to carefully define their terms, they would realize that they were not on the same wavelength at all.

I know that certain terms and references some Christians use cause a certain reaction in me, not based on what they might mean by those terms but by what I have come to associate with those terms. One of those, just as an example, is when someone refers to another Christian as anointed, meaning that said individual is specially used or gifted by God to speak or minister in an especially powerful way. Usually the term is used of leaders in the church, pastors or teachers or sometimes people who minister through music.

Now when I hear the term anointed, what it says to me has something of a Pentecostal ring to it. That is, for a preacher to be anointed his preaching, both through content and delivery, has to result in a lot of amens, tears, and even conversions. It suggests to me that the response to the sermon is immediate and emotional and direct. You know as you preach how people are responding to your preaching.

One the flipside, it suggests that preaching that is not like this, not anointed, is somehow inferior preaching. It may have been a good message, but it was not one that moved people. It wasn’t Spirit-filled even if it was Word-filled. Now there may very well be lots of sermons that have great content but perhaps aren’t very inspiring—and don’t result in emotional responses in the congregation—but I wouldn’t limit the power of a particular sermon to this understanding of anointed.

For me to associate all of this with the word anointed may or may not be right. But all I have to hear is the word—“That pastor is anointed!”—and that’s what immediately comes to my mind. And, subsequently, I wonder what such a person would make of my sermons, which hardly ever result in noticeable emotional responses. What does it say of my preaching? In my worst moments, when I hear such language, I question whether I am anointed in any sense of the word!

Another problem amongst Christians when it comes to in-language is that when we become too accustomed to such terms and easy points of reference, we run the risk of not thinking more deeply about what we’re saying, about the words and language we use. If our thinking doesn’t go deeper than the formulaic terms we use, that is a definite problem.

But we don’t only misunderstand and confuse one another with our in-language. We confuse non-believers, people who don’t have the advantage of having some familiarity with our way of using what a friend of mine used to call “Christianese.” People who aren’t believers also bring a bunch of baggage to some of the terms and references we use—just think of what more liberal Americans think when they hear the terms “evangelical” or “born-again Christian.” They hear things, in some cases, that we don’t want them to hear.

For someone to use churchy-talk with a non-Christian is just as problematic as me using academic theological language with other believers. So, for instance, while some might know that soteriology is the study of the Christian doctrine of salvation, many if not most Christians would not—but they don’t really need to since to understand salvation knowing such a specialized academic term is unnecessary.

To that extent, I would not use a word like soteriology in everyday conversation and if I ever did use it in a Bible study or sermon, I would carefully define it so people would understand—never use such language simply to impress people, to let them know that you know what it means even if they don’t. The problem, though, is that we don’t have to use a word like this to confuse or mislead someone outside the faith—just saying so and so is “saved” might be enough. Depending on the person, what we say might be no more decipherable than those short-hand squiggles and lines I learned in high school!

This kind of thing occurs to me when I’m preaching or leading my congregation in prayer—because I can sometimes catch myself using words and phrases that are essentially short-cuts, especially when in the moment no other words or phrases come to mind! So I’m guilty of this too!

But if instead we intentionally steer away from using short-hand in-language or at least become more accustomed to articulating our beliefs using language the person on the street can grasp, not only will we be better communicators to those around us who aren’t Christians but we will also be challenged to think more deliberately about the faith we profess. It does us good also.

We should—once in awhile—stop and think about how we express our faith to those around us. We should consider our words, and understand that our words matter. Because if our goal—or one of our goals—is to proclaim our faith, to communicate it clearly, and articulate it in ways that people can understand, then we should make the effort to ensure that people’s first-hand experience of our faith is not our short-hand.

Receiving (and sometimes missing) grace

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my own relationship with God and about how hard it is sometimes to give it a lot of thought or consideration because God is what I do for a living. I don’t intend for that last sentence to sound irreverent, but being a pastor sometimes makes it hard to spend time focusing on your own faith, on your own walk with Christ. And even saying my God is what I do for a living misconstrues the truth and misleads. It’s a weird vocation in that who you are is all mixed up and can get all confused with what you do. If I weren’t a pastor, I’d still read my Bible, but I wouldn’t see sermon outlines in every passage I read (not that I do this all the time but it does happen). If I weren’t a pastor, I’d still pray, but I wouldn’t be leading a whole congregation in prayer each week. Being a pastor means blurring indistinguishably the line between the personal and professional or vocational.

Ironically, sometimes all that goes along with being a pastor can have the effect of crowding out consistent prayer time and Bible study. The very thing I want to teach others to do, I struggle to get done myself. Again, the language of “do” intrudes. The word “be” is much better. But I can’t teach others to be something I myself am not. I can’t pass on habits, spiritual or otherwise, that I don’t myself practice. I worry about this – I worry about how my own failures and weaknesses affect my congregation and how perfect I need to be to be the pastor they need me to be.

Underlying this sometimes, and in some ways, is a failure to grasp grace. Core to the good news is that God comes to us—forgives, redeems, reveals, makes new, and heals—without any effort on our part. We don’t deserve this. He doesn’t have to extend this grace, but grace—and love—are his character (as are holiness, mercy, goodness, justice and many other attributes). He passes on salvation not as a prize for good behaviour but out of an overflowing of good will toward his creatures.

I admit I don’t get grace well enough—that is, while I understand it theologically and biblically and intellectually, many of my attitudes, reactions, moods, and ways of thinking have not yet been sufficiently transformed (converted!) by the reality of this grace, by the reality of who God is. And who he is for us.

I hope admitting such a thing isn’t too startling in coming from a pastor. All I know is that when I look at myself, I see so much need for spiritual transformation. I can discern endless cracks in the walls, leaks in the plumbing, and drafts coming in from the outside.

One of the things I don’t like about being a pastor is that I spend a lot of time not being transparent. That is, most of the time around folks in my congregation it isn’t appropriate to admit to my own struggles and weaknesses and flaws. This is true even if one of my struggles is particularly dogging me at the moment. Finding a place where one can be spiritually open with all the messiness found in even a pastor’s heart is not easy. Companions are not easy to locate. Or maybe I’m not very good at recognizing them when they’re standing right in front of me. Maybe part of me feels I have to be closed off even to people outside the church who could be potential spiritual companions.

Even when posting on this blog, I’ve been quite cautious about the degree of my openness and how personal and direct I allow myself to be—it’s not an anonymous blog and people I know, including some from my church, read it (once in awhile anyway!). Exercising discretion in disclosing personal matters is something every pastor learns quickly.

Part of me wonders (and is still very much figuring out) how a pastor is supposed to relate to his congregation—what he should be and what they would like him to be and what he ought to be could very well be three different things! Though doubtless there is at least some overlap.

Whatever the relationship, certainly grace plays a central role. For even if the pastor does disclose a personal struggle (though not one damaging to his authority or credibility or the well-being of the church; that is, not serious moral failure) that startles some or is simply unexpected in its honesty, hopefully people will still see the pastor as pastor even if the cracks and flaws are more clearly seen. Certainly that is how I hope my people see me—and it’s how I hope they see one another: though broken, God-made; though flawed, redeemed; and though struggling with sin, rescued from its slavery. Seeing one another through the eyes of grace means seeing one another as God does—means relating to one another how God does. We don’t (hopefully!) expect moral perfection of ourselves; and neither should we expect it of those around us.

My prayer for the coming year—though not a steadfast New Year’s Resolution—is that I can learn to rest more comfortably in God’s grace and that I will be, in my attitudes and actions, more transformed by this same grace. I wonder how much our church lives—our journeys of faith and relationships with God—would change if only we had a deeper grasp of not only grace but of the God who in mercy continually extends it in our direction.

A Brief Post-Christmas, Post-New Year's Catch Up

So once again I wonder: should I even bother posting at all? I ask this only because I've been away from it for a month and a half and there are only, likely, less than a dozen people who would even have noticed!

Though my lack of posting this time was not my fault. My computer had to have a hard-drive replaced. This necessitated a three week absence. Fortunately, I did not suffer from the sort of withdrawal I was warned might occur. I gather that some folks, when having to do without their computers, esperience severe symptoms such as sweating, seizures, and incoherent muttering. Shock eventually sets in. Meanwhile, with the exception of having to hand write my sermon notes and use the phone rather than e-mail on a few occasions, I barely noticed. I'm not sure whether this is a good thing or a bad thing.

In the interim, Christmas has come and gone. Though our tree and decorations are still up. It was a good, if busy holiday, this year. It was especially fun watching Ella, now four, opening her presents. That was really the best part, as much as I, I dare to admit, also love getting gifts!

Time has flown by in another way too. My wife is well into her third trimester with our twin boys. We have a lot to do before they arrive! Our house is modest, perhaps even small, and so there's a fair bit of organization and preparation involved in making sure we have a place for them and for us. It will mean juggling our three bedrooms and their present functions!

Having two more kids in the house -- twin boys -- is a reality I can't even begin to imagine. It still seems unreal, abstract, like something I know is going to happen (and relatively soon, in this case) but still have no context for understanding. Of course, we already have one child so we're not completely unfamiliar with the process. But I'm guessing that having these additions to the family will have the effect of re-orienting us so completely that we will be adjusting for quite some time.

All that said, with church responsibilities, the upcoming birth of twins, not to mention all of the other things life tends to throw our way, I wonder sometimes how much a priority I should make this blog. When I do the actual math (time [potentially] expended [if I want to make it worthwhile for readers] + readers [both the number and level of interest they have in this blog] + pleasure gained from amateur, inconsistent writing efforts on my part), the answer isn't always encouraging! Let's just say, I'm thinking about it.

For now, though, I'll try to keep it up and see if I have anything worth saying.

Walking Across Rooms

A small group of us from our church just finished a four week study called Just Walk Across A Room. It’s a DVD curriculum based on Bill Hybels’ book of the same name. This resource is for helping Christians do the work of evangelism even if they don’t have the gift of evangelism. Essentially, the message is this: if you are already a faithful Christian, make a genuine effort to befriend people who are far from God—whether in your workplace or neighbourhood or where you enjoy recreation—simply for the sake of loving them where they are. The point is not to see people as evangelism projects but as individuals created by and for God. This means showing interest in them, caring about them, serving them, becoming friends with them, regardless of whether or not they ever show interest in God, church, Jesus, or spiritual matters.

Hybels highlights three friendships throughout the study (through clips and interviews) that he invested himself in and how, in the midst of those friendships, he was given opportunity to share his faith. But all of these friendships began in very ordinary ways. All began, as the title suggests, with a walk across a room, a willingness to leave one’s comfort zone and either help someone out or just strike up a conversation. In one instance, the friendship was eight years old before the person came to faith. One of his friends interviewed has yet to come to faith but is now more open to the possibility.

I don’t intend here to post a full review of this curriculum. But I will say that it’s a great practical way to get people talking and thinking about being ordinary Christians and what it means for each of us to share our faith. I’m hoping to have at least one or two more groups of people use this curriculum in the coming months.

Sometimes when you do a study on a practical topic, you wonder if anyone who did the study will ever actually apply it in their own lives. It’s deceptively easy to take lessons learned in a small group and leave it there and not be intentional about living it out. The Letter of James warns about this very problem.

So the other night I was leaving our church, which is located across the road from our house, and I saw one of my neighbours (whom I don’t know well) working outside building his new garage. Now, as I said, I didn’t know this guy (and still don’t really know him well), and I’m the kind of person who’s usually hesitant about beginning a conversation with a relative stranger. Odd, perhaps, for a pastor. So as I was leaving the church and walking toward our house, I had the feeling that I should stop and talk to the guy. I did, and I’m glad I did so.

Granted, it was maybe a ten minute conversation and wasn’t at all religious. It was, by definition, small-talk. But all conversations—to say nothing of friendships—have to start somewhere. And in this case, I felt I was being challenged by God to live out simply one of the key lessons of this study—sometimes it’s all about walking across the room or, in this instance, across the street.

I have one more example. We have new neighbours. It’s a young couple who bought the house next to ours. They’ve had to do a lot of renovations to the house because there was a fire in the home at the beginning of the year. Anyway, a couple of days ago my little girl and I made a couple of chocolate cakes and decided that we, as a family, ought to bring one of them over to our new neighbours as a way of saying hello and welcome. We ended up hanging out there for more than an hour talking with them and their extended family (who also live in the area). Here it was a matter of a walk down the street.

But both opportunities were simple—simple enough for anyone, and a step taken that could lead to opportunities to share faith with people far from God. Neither occasion demanded that I drop off tracts, share the four spiritual laws, or memorize vast amounts of apologetic information (all of which can still have their place depending on the situation). All one needs is a receptive heart, a willing and submissive spirit, and a desire to show love and concern to others who are as much in need of the gospel we ourselves proclaim through our living. And one the best ways to proclaim Jesus through our living is through simple acts of walking across rooms—which is not unlike what Christ himself did in walking across the room from eternity to time.

Keep on Reading

Over the last year I've been on a Bible reading plan. I must confess, I've never used a Bible reading plan prior to this. But last year when I saw the The Books of the Bible presentation of the TNIV put out by the International Bible Society, I was immediately attracted to the format and its possibilities for encouraging fuller Bible reading. So last January several members of our church committed themselves to reading the Bible in a year. We even had a special service dedicated to the importance of the Scriptures in our lives as Christians -- we also dedicated and handed out these new Bibles during this service.

Generally, one would think that being on a reading plan would make it easier to dedicate oneself to keeping regular in one's Scripture reading. And I think that, largely, this is true. I've been more regular in my reading over the course of this past year as a result. Although one of the things I've said to those also on this reading plan is that the important thing, even if you get behind, is to keep on reading. So, if you're supposed to be in the NT and are still finishing up the OT, don't allow getting behind become a discouragement that halts your reading. Keep on reading. Even if your one year plan turns into a two year plan, keep on reading.

I've had to tell myself this too. Over the summer it was a little easier to let myself get behind, especially once I was in the major prophets. Some portions of Scripture are definitely more challenging and difficult than others. Some books are simply hard to plow through. And as a result, I'm behind myself. And although the reading plan is meant for us to read the Bible through from beginning to end, I've actually chosen to mix-up my reading, moving from Paul's epistles to Acts, to the general epistles, and back to the OT. This, I find, helps. I'm not entirely sure yet whether I'll complete it within the alloted year -- and I certainly plan on attempting this -- my plan is still to keep on reading.

One of the great benefits of a reading plan is that you don't arbitrarily decide what portions of the Bible to read. It's not only about reading your favourite books of the Bible. It's not just about finding an encouraging verse (out of context!) for the day. You're taken through the entire Bible. Rather than sticking primarily to the epistles (especially Paul), the Gospels, and the Psalms, you also have to read the minor prophets, the books of the Law, wisdom literature, and lots of genealogies!

Of course, one of the downsides of a year-long reading plan is that you read at a pace that doesn't really allow for deeper study. And if you get behind at all, playing catch up means you have even less time to ponder the words you read. But, that said, there is some benefit to reading through an entire gospel or epistle all at once as one would a book or novel. Like reading a novel, one is immersed in a story, a world, and you become a participant in it. So much of the Bible is narrative that one must think that God intends this. Verse and chapter divisions, while helpful for some purposes, is not as helpful for this kind of reading as it tends to encourage atomizing the text.

I will say, though, that this kind of Bible reading should not be our only kind of Bible reading. As much as I love reading through a whole book in a sitting (when possible!), as is the case with one of the epistles or even one of the shorter gospels (such as Mark), there's no substitute for deeper, more intensive Bible study. Breaking down verses, getting a grasp of specific words and their meaning in context, pondering the text slowly and prayerfully and studiously is a discipline important for all believers, not only pastors and teachers.

So I encourage those of you who haven't ever tried a reading plan to do so. You may think that there's no way of getting through the Bible in a year, but even if you don't make it all in a year it is good to have the discipline of a reading plan. Probably without exception, most who work through reading plans have days when they miss their daily passages. We all get busy. And sometimes we can let lesser things crowd out the priority of Bible reading. But a reading plan does have a way of reminding, of keeping you on track, and of keeping you accountable. All this to say, keep on reading.

So's Christmas . . .

The other day I was in a grocery store picking up a few things and I heard it, something I wasn't that interested in hearing yet, something that, when you hear it too early, inspires precisely the opposite sentiment intended. That it is Christmas music.

There's a saying: someone will say something is imminent, something's coming, and then someone else will say: "So's Christmas!" And it is. Christmas is coming. I can't stop it, but I can say that I wish it wasn't so quickly pushed on us.

Christmas is a mixed bag. In that bag there is both blessing and curse, good and bad, pleasure and pain, stress and peace. And, inevitably, each year when it approaches I experience mixed feelings. A part of me looks forward to time with family, giving and receiving gifts, seeing the look on my daughter's face when she opens presents. And then another part of me dreads the extra busyness, trips to insanely crowded stores, the swelled budget, and the emotions that go along with years of Christmas memories.

We can bring with us all kinds of unspoken and even unconscious expectations to holidays such as Christmas. Maybe especially Christmas. For years I had a picture in my head of an ideal Christmas. And each year that ideal picture was frustrated. Now, the ideal itself was questionable, to be sure, but I imagine that I'm not unique in having one. Usually there's the perfect Christmas we picture and there's the Christmas we actually experience.

Someone told me the other that the big problem with Christmas is that people get all worked up about how they want it to turn out, their expectations get all ramped up, and so inevitably they end up disappointed. I think that's true. And I think it's partly because people want Christmas to be special and to be the kind of experience that transcends the rest of life. So for example we hope against hope that at least for one day we won't argue with anyone in our family, that there will be "peace on earth." Or that there will be peace at least while someone is passing the potatoes and stuffing and until all the gifts are unwrapped.

Of course, there is nothing special about Christmas -- there's nothing magical about that date on the calendar. If you don't have peace in your heart already, you're not altogether likely to find it on that day. The holiday won't do the job of peace-making for us. Only he whose name is at the root of this holy-day can bring such peace. And the peace he longs to bring to each of us is something we need more than one day out of 365! To that extent, every day should be Christmas day.

So Christmas is coming. Yes it is. And since my wife and mother-in-law love Christmas, I've already begun to hear about it at home too. I guess what I don't like about hearing the music in the stores already is that the mood it hopes to invoke is a manufactured peace, a commercialized sense of hope and cheer. It's the way peace, love, joy, and hope are sold as sale items at WalMart.

When we think we can purchase what we need, we lose sight of the fact that with Christmas God began the transaction that gives us all we need. God purchased our peace through the incarnation -- the coming of God in the flesh -- and eventually through the blood of the cross. What we need, we cannot use a credit card to acquire. What God freely gives, we can never buy. There's never enough money in our account. Love became flesh and blood on that first Christmas. It is a love freely offered, freely given, to be freely received. So when someone says to you, "Christmas is coming," I hope that this comes to your mind more quickly than that shopping list you've drawn up.

Count Your Blessings: Part Two (and, apparently, Three!)

Yes, yes, it's been awhile . . . again . . . I can't say that I have any excuses -- I'm probably no busier than your average person. Perhaps I just need to be better organized with my time. In my defense, I tried to post a couple of days ago and my computer re-booted on its own. Frustrated, I put it off. So here I go again . . .

Last time I mentioned that my wife is pregnant. Well, she had an ultrasound about a week ago and -- lo and behold -- we received some shocking and exciting news: not only is my wife pregnant, but she is pregnant with twins! I must say, I was absolutely stunned; and then once the fact settled in, I became incredibly excited. At least one of the kids is a boy; the other one probably is, but he was "hiding." So in about four or five months we're going to go from being a family of three to a family of five. That'll be an adjustment!

The real blessing here is that we weren't even sure if we were going to have any more kids at all. Since Alisha was seriously depressed during her pregnancy with Ella, doctors actually advised us against it. I guess it was sort of a cost-benefit analysis. It was about weighing the risks. And then in the spring we had a pregnancy scare which made us reconsider the possibility. With much prayer, conversation, and contemplation, we decided to open ourselves to more kids -- though we thought that it would be, at least at first, one kid! When God blesses, sometimes he does so abundantly.

So we have a lot of preparation in the days ahead. And once the shock subsided, my wife and I realized that having twins was going to mean two new carseats, two cribs (eventually anyway), etc. All that said, we're still filled with joy. Now, being a parent and concerned husband, I'll be that much more relaxed when the twins have been successfully delivered and they and Mommy are healthy and well and home. Trepidation accompanies joy.

In weighing the risks of being open to having more kids, we found out we're having two which significantly raises the risks of the pregnancy, not to mention the risks of parenting! One set of risks has been exchanged for another. But I guess life is a risk -- to sound terribly cliche. Life wouldn't be full of much without risks. God blesses -- and richly -- but risks also come along for the ride. The catch is we can't receive blessings without also accepting the risks. Counting our blessings means also counting the costs. And right now I'm glad to be able to count both, because we're having boys!

Long Time, No Post . . .

So, yeah, it's been awhile since I've posted. I figure not too many people are waiting with bated-breath at what I'll say next, so my absence probably isn't very noteworthy. In any case, I just haven't had time lately. Given this, I have no earthly idea how people can manage to keep up to date on things like Twitter, Face Book, and My Space. I'm lucky to check my e-mail and come here to post on my own blog!

Even this post will not be long -- just a brief note to catch up on a couple of things.

First of all, tomorrow my little girl turns 4. Wow. I can't believe she's been with us that long. And she's growing so fast. What's cool is that this is the first birthday that she's really been able to anticipate. Actually, she's been looking forward to it for months! Should be fun to see her face tomorrow.

And second . . . Well, this is a BIG second. My wife is pregnant and due (roughly) the beginning of April. She's just entered her second trimester. We found out late July. And we're all pretty excited. I'll save this story for later, but since we weren't sure we'd ever have another one we're pretty psyched!

Hmmm . . . That's all the big news. Church is going along nicely. This fall we're doing a new four week group study using Just Walk Across the Room. I'm preaching through the Gospel of Mark. We're going to replace an old run down direction sign for a shiny new one. My wife and I are going to an evangelism conference for a week or so later this month. And our church's 30th anniversary is also approaching and we're hoping to do something special for that.

Anyway, I'm hoping to post more regularly from here on in. Can't make any promises, though, but I'll try!

Count Your Blessings: Part One

Life is full of blessings. Some blessings are in the form of people, some are things, some are experiences. Unfortunately, we often take these blessings for granted. We can so easily forget how blessed we are; our blessings, right in front of us, escape our view. This happens to me sometimes too. So to remind myself, and to share them with you (whoever you are!), I thought I'd list some of them here. Therefore, without any further adieu, let me begin to count my blessings.

This, folks, is my wife, Alisha. Here she is doing something she loves doing: reading. And here she is doing it at a place she loves: her parents' camp. Now, I can't even begin to imagine how big a blessing she has been to me. Whether through her intelligence, her sense of humour, her sense of adventure, or her faith she has made me more me. I think one of the most important things our husbands and wives do for us is to draw us more out of ourselves, help us to become more of who are meant by God to be. Alisha has definitely done this for me. She has been a source of strength and encouragement more times than I can count. And she has also challenged my comfort zones on plenty of occasions, bringing me on all kinds of adventures that I would have hardly embarked upon on my own. Of course, sometimes that means getting lost in the woods!

Aha. My little girl, Ella. My, my, it's hard to believe she'll turn four this October. She's smart, funny, creative, imaginative, has a great laugh, loves to tease, enjoys dancing, listens to all kinds of music from worship music to classical to U2 and Jars of Clay, and loves singing and will do so even when out in the yard by herself. While being a parent is not always easy, I can't imagine having it any easier than we do with Ella. She brings joy into our lives, and surprises us constantly with her ability to express herself. Her personality is a curious one. She absorbs knowledge and information at a breackneck pace. She is also sensitive and feels things deeply. And she's a lot of fun to be around! She reminds me of the importance of play.

This is Sharon. She's my mother-in-law. And she's been a huge blessing too. While I tease her mercilessly sometimes, it's not because any of those really mean mother-in-law jokes apply to her. We actually get along incredibly well. We talk a lot. We talk about books, music, and, quite often, have long, deep conversations about life, ministry, and faith. We share similar interests so much so that she sometimes says I'm more like her than either of her kids! In addition to all this, she's been and continues to be a tremendous support to me in my ministry in countless ways. Plus, she and my father-in-law live relatively close and so can babysit quite frequently!

Speaking of my father-in-law, this is him. This is Harold. He's the strong, silent, sometimes grumpy type. He's a man of the woods, of working and playing outdoors. He's a man of integrity, someone trustworthy, someone reliable. He's also a tease. I think that's where Ella gets it! He knows a lot more about cars than I do, so he helps us out when our car needs looking at. In a lot of ways, he's become the father I never had.

These are just some of the blessings in my life and, surprise, surprise, they're people! Isn't that the way? There are other important people, too, and I will get to them. But it's getting late now and I need to get to bed. So this has become part one of this post because I need the blessing of a comfortable bed and a good night's sleep.

Truth in Fiction

Both at home and in my office at the church, there are walls lined with books. And in both places some books belong to me and some belong to my wife. In fact, during our actual wedding ceremony we included as a part of the vows, "All my worldly goods to thee I endow." Then and now, there is something ironic about that vow. We didn't have an abundance of worldly goods then, and the same is true now. We joked at the time that this part of our vows referred specifically to our respective book collections! So, appropriately, my books are also hers and vice-versa.

But of course we have different interests when it comes to books. Alisha prefers fiction, particularly historical fiction, and books that relate to whatever she's working on. For instance, she does some home-schooling with our daughter, and so we've seen many books on this topic borrowed from the library clutter endtables and dining room tables and various other nooks and crannies.

As far as I'm concerned, however, my reading tends toward the academic or semi-academic. To take one example, I just picked up Darrell Bock's book, The Missing Gospels: Unearthing the Truth Behind Alternative Christianities. And I likely would have done so whether I were presently a pastor or not. It's not simply work reading. I also spent a considerable amount of time re-reading some recent books by Eugene Peterson over my vacation: Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places and The Jesus Way. I didn't finish them by any stretch, but enjoyed immensely what I did read.

But one thing that rarely makes my reading list is fiction. For some reason fiction and I have never clicked. My interest has never been stoked by novels. I think in part the reason is that my experiences with literature in high school did nothing to endear the classics to me. If anything, it instilled in me an aversion to the likes of Shakespeare and anything that we had to study in class. We were taught (or they tried to teach us) to analyse rather than enjoy and savour. But nitpicking and picking apart just seemed, to me at least, to suck the life out of books that I might have otherwise appreciated.

And rarely does my wife hassle me to read anything. Except she recently read a quadrilogy of books by Karen Hancock called The Legends of the Guardian-King. So she kept insisting (more or less) that I ought to read these books. One thing in her favour this time is that they were fantasy novels. One of the rare instances where I picked up novels includes reading The Lord of the Rings trilogy.

So when on vacation, I decided to give them a whirl. I have to say that I was very surprised and impressed. Of course, I still have to finish book four. Full judgement is something I reserve until the very end. They're touted as being an allegorical fantasy series, and there are definite biblical parallels to both characters and events, but they would be readable and enjoyable even without that extra layer to the narrative. On a non-allegorical level, there is a faith perspective in these books; that is, there is a spiritual world-view that parallels Christianity. Tersius is the Christ-figure. Eidon is God. Terstmeets are church services. If you're looking for some good fantasy fiction, I heartily recommend Hancock's books.

One of the things that struck me as I was reading these books was how the author wove into the story faith elements that could resonate deeply with people of faith in the real world, whether it was about the mystery of God and what it means to trust him even when we don't fully understand his ways or how we can sometimes struggle with our calling and vocation, with our own weaknesses, despite the identity we know God has given us. She also shows through her narrative the way people struggle even in coming to faith and how individuals can resist the pull of God on their heart. She shows how God can allow us to experience trials and how trials can make it more difficult for people to believe in God. We also see characters who are Christians ("Terstans") and how they try and live lives of witness to those around them who still refuse to believe.

What I also appreciated about her writing style is that she doesn't bludgeon anyone over the head with religious belief -- there is never a moment when you feel manipulated as a reader. Rather, she allows the story to play out more naturally. These books are not sermons in narrative form. Her writing is artful, thoughtful, and rich with visual detail and description that pulls you not only into the characters but into a vivid, imaginative world that betrays the rich influence of other writers like Tolkien (Middle-Earth) and Lewis (Narnia). Of course, I doubt she's unique among modern fantasy writers in her ability to do this, but since I read next to no fiction it is new to me.

I also enjoyed how some of her themes and ideas resonated with me personally -- that is, I found myself, at times, in her story. And this, of course, is the whole point of story. This is the power of story. And so it's no wonder that much of our Bible is cast in story form. The Scriptures are the story of God with us. I said that her ability is obviously not unique. All good storytellers do this. So when I told my wife and mother-in-law about my experience of reading these novels, they weren't surprised but were glad that I enjoyed them. If you're already a fan of classic writers like Tolkien and Lewis, no doubt you'd enjoy these books too.

Vacation: Finale

Our vacation is over. Actually, it was over two days ago. On our last day, Sunday, I must confess it felt strange to be packing for home. I was genuinely sorry, at first, to have reached the end. I'm not completely sure why, because I've always experienced a readiness to return to regular life after vacation. Usually, I'm anxious to get back to normal routine. This year, though, I think I ended up finding it so relaxing that I didn't want it to end! But end it has.

We spent our vacation at my in-laws camp, which along with a number of others, is located on a small lake. My wife, daughter, and I spent nearly two weeks playing games, canoing, BBQing, reading, sitting in the sun and, on occasion, visiting neighbours from other camps. And for a good chunk of our vacation, we were joined by my mother-in-law. On fewer occasions, we were joined by my father-in-law.

So now we're home. The fall is already underway. In less than a month my daughter turns 4. Thanksgiving follows on its heels. A new season of church ministry is up and going. And Christmas, as they say, is just around the corner. Arriving back, it's easy for me to all of a sudden feel overwhelmed with all there is to do. Having been on vacation makes one feel as though you've been out of the loop. There is stuff to catch up on. In light of all this, I hope and pray that I can carry the spirit of rest from vacation into the rest of life.

Vacation: Part Two

Yesterday we got back from our trip to Oasis (Convention Assembly) and our extra day for our anniversary. It was a good time away, and the best part was seeing some old, good friends that I hadn't connected with in awhile. It was also cool that Convention was held at Mount Allison, where I went for my undergrad. I've not gotten back there much since graduating in '95 and it was nice to revisit my old stomping grounds. Our daughter, Ella, was very glad to have us back with her. Though I know she enjoyed staying at her grand-parents very much!

Despite the fact that we were away, had time together, stayed in a bed and breakfast, and enjoyed eating out, this time away was not vacation. Technically, it was work. Going to Convention, while not exactly strenuous, is still part of ministry.

So our real vacation begins yesterday/today. And tomorrow we head off to my in-laws camp for the rest of vacation. Being there means quiet, stillness, reading, sleeping in, playing with my daughter, paying scant attention to my watch, noodling on my guitar, and generally just relaxing. We usually take vacation in late August/early September. It's not as hot, there aren't as many bugs, and it makes a definite break between summer and fall. That said, not sure if we'll do it this way next year or not. We'll see.

I just pray that I can rest as much with my heart and mind as I will, no doubt, with the rest of me. It can be hard to turn off work-thinking. Anyway, I'll not likely be back here for most of the two weeks, if at all. Time to go offline, as it were. See you all when I log back on!

God's talking; are we listening?

Well tomorrow our VBS starts (Vacation Bible School for those uninitiated!). And on Wednesday my wife and I head off to Convention Assembly (now called Oasis). After this, on Saturday evening (also our 6th anniversary), we begin officially our two weeks of vacation which, wonderfully, encompasses three Sundays. The break will be very nice.

I'm going to try to do some more intentional listening to God over these next few weeks. Let's just say that I need some refreshing before a new season of ministry begins in the fall. I'm considering preaching through the Gospel of Mark when I come back. I did this with the Gospel of John a couple of years ago, and I think that going through the life and ministry of Jesus is incredibly valuable and has the effect (or can and should have the effect) of renewing our focus on he who ought to be the focus of all we do and are. It's easy to get sidetracked both in life and in ministry with peripheral matters. But whether this is what I make my preaching about post-vacation is going to be one of the things I'm praying about.

I know there are a couple of other pastors who occasionally drop by this blog, so let me ask you a question: how do you experience God's leading in relation to preaching? How do you seek his leading? What makes it easiest to discern his leading?

And for those of you who aren't pastors, really the same questions could almost apply. I preached today about listening to God -- and specifically focused on the need for stopping long enough to listen; that is, taking sabbath time, whether a full day or not, that involves you, your Bible, and even a pen and journal as a way of engaging and being engaged with God. What makes it easiest for you to discern his voice? I'd especially be interested in the viewpoint of those who aren't pastors on the value and role of listening to sermons in all of this. Do sermons regularly make it easier for you to discern God's leading in your life or do you find that you hear God more clearly through your quiet time? As a pastor, I can sometimes wonder whether what I bring to the pulpit hits or misses and why or why not.

My hope and prayer is that over the next few weeks my ears will become more and more open -- and that I can still my heart and mind long enough to listen! This is definitely something I need to do a lot of before I can do any more talking once I return to the pulpit in September.

Back in the Pew

Something that I really miss is being able to listen to other people preach. As a pastor, it's an incredible treat and privilege to hear sermons delivered by anyone other than me. For years listening to good biblical messages was what I enjoyed most about going to church. I can still recall what it was like to hear for the first time a Baptist pastor preach (I was raised Catholic) and how amazed I was at the time and care they had obviously put into their message. As a former Catholic, I was more accustomed to homilies or brief sermonettes that rarely delved deeply into the biblical text. The message itself may very well have been biblical, but I never came away with a better understand of a specific text.

This coming Sunday is my last until mid-September. For three Sundays in a row I'm on vacation; and it's often when I'm on vacation that I get the chance to hear other pastors' sermons. I am truly looking forward to it.

These days, of course, going to church isn't the only way to hear sermons. You can listen to (and see) plenty of sermons online. This past week, partly through the initial prompting of my mother-in-law, I listened to some online sermons; and I was blessed, for the most part, by what I heard. While most folks only hear one, maybe two, sermons a week, I found myself listening to several. Probably around 5 or 6. Amos 8 speaks of a "a famine . . . of hearing the words of the Lord," and while this is not what he meant, I realized this week in hearing some good messages how much I had missed being back in the pew. I realized my own hunger and need for hearing the word of God proclaimed. No wonder I listened to so many!

And it made me realize that, though I am very blessed to be a pastor, there is a genuine sense at times that I miss being back in the pew. In being a pastor, it's not at all as though I have graduated or progressed past my own need for edification; I just need to seek it through avenues other than Sunday morning worship. Although now I have to be more deliberate in seeking out ways of getting fed by the word of God.

What's funny, too, is that I can easily forget what it is like to be at the receiving end of a sermon. I can find myself convicted as well as fed, admonished as well as quenched. Some messages simply remind you of simple but crucial truths. Others point you more fully to the holiness of God. Still others challenge you to follow Jesus and to walk with him more faithfully.

And listening to other pastors' sermons challenges me in another way, also; that is, they challenge me to listen as if I were back in the pew and not another pastor. So often when I do listen to another sermon, it can be far too easy to slip into professional critique mode. In other words, I begin thinking about how good the sermon is, how effective the illustrations are, how organized the points are, etc. And I may even find myself thinking, "Hmmm, that was well done. I can apply that to my own preaching." Nothing wrong with this perhaps, but better that I listen with my heart and mind. Better that I listen for what God wants me to hear.

Then I am challenged to be more reflective at times about my own preaching. Because there are times that watching other pastors preach makes you think about your own preaching habits, your own mannerisms, style, themes that perhaps you continue to use, etc. It makes me think: what are people hearing when I preach?

All in all, hearing other pastors preach is an incredibly valuable experience on many levels. Of course, thinking about all of this brings to mind one of the things that makes me as a pastor very nervous at times -- when another preacher is visiting our church and I'm the one preaching! Because then I know that just as I watch other preachers with a critical and evaluative eye, so they must be watching me. That can induce a little holy fear! I can only hope that those preachers, in finding themselves back in the pew, listen to me and hear not only my flaws and mistakes but also God's word proclaimed faithfully. I can't ask for much more!

Clutter

We all have them.

It can be a room, a shed, a drawer, a closet, maybe even a large chunk of our basement. We all have places where we dump stuff that, right now, we don't have time to organize and put away properly. How many of us have a so-called "junk drawer"? And how many of us close the doors to certain rooms of our house when people drop by? And how many of us fear anyone getting a look at our basements?

Well, while we probably have more than one space like this in our house, our spare bedroom no doubt wins the prize for the most disorganized, cluttered, utterly disastrous space in our home. Rarely do we ever have anyone who needs to sleep in there -- even my mother-in-law prefers our couch to the mattress in the spare room -- so it's become this sort of catch-all-don't-have-time-to-get-this-put-in-its-proper-spot area.

That is, until today.

Today we began the process of straightening up this room. A couple of the bigger pieces of furniture we're going to stick in the basement (don't even go there!). And my wife is getting a second hand corner desk that will help us organize much of what is in that room -- namely, all of her scrapbooking stuff.

I really love my mother-in-law, because she really helped me get into that spare room today. We don't have a large house, so sometimes space becomes an issue. But she's quite good at thinking about things in an efficient and organized way in a way that my wife and I are not -- or that we sometimes don't take the time to think about!

And I have to tell you, there's no feeling like getting something accomplished, especially in getting your house straightened up or even a room or, yes, even part of a room.

But we all end up with clutter. We all have junk drawers. Or closets. Or rooms. Not everything that clutters up a room or drawer is necessarily something to be tossed, but it's amazing to me how many things we keep hanging onto on the off chance that someday it might prove useful.

I've heard of some people who are addictive collectors, and how they can barely get around their house because of the stacks of magazines, old newspapers, books, and knick-knacks that they keep buying on the Shopping Channel. Most of us, thank goodness, are not that bad off. We should pray for those we know who are!

Yet even for the rest of us who do not accumulate clutter obsessively, we can never permanently get rid of clutter. No matter how clean we've gotten a room, no matter how proud we are of how neat and tidy we've gotten it, quite often, over time, it ends up back in the same state before our whirlwind of energetic housework. Case in point: this is not the first time we've cleaned the spare bedroom. I can think of at least two other distinct occasions when we've attacked the clutter in there. And we've only been here three years! I guess it often gets ignored for the sake of the rooms that we use more frequently.

Anyway, I guess this is true with us also. We accumulate emotional clutter. We all have hearts that are sometimes in desperate need of a good tidying up -- and no doubt several times over the course of our lives. We just get done straightening up one room, and we turn and see dust bunnies and clutter in another. It seems neverending.

But thankfully much of our own clutter we don't have to deal with on our own. Sometimes even other Christians are quite capable with brooms, mops, and dishrags. Other people can help us with our clutter. And God, it turns out, is the best housecleaner. He not only helps take care of the clutter but also shows us ways of preventing it from accumulating so easily and quickly.

Through the Magnifying Glass

This coming Sunday I'm preaching about magnifying God. Originally, my thought had been to preach on praise using one of the Psalms (96, 98, or 145, though are many like these to choose from). And I was thinking about praise and worship and asking myself, "What is the importance of praising God? What is the importance of singing together as a congregation to God?" We are invited to praise, called to praise, and commanded to praise. But why? One reason is that, of course, God deserves our praise. He is worthy of our praise. But that reason alone doesn't seem to make praise personal enough.

Then I ended up watching these videos (here, here, and here) and that, plus having to focus on God while also having to deal with some personal worries, led me to think of one word: magnify. I found a definition of magnification that reads this way: “Magnification is the process of enlarging something only in appearance, not in physical size; magnification of the image does not change the perspective of the image.” I looked up the definition because I guess I had never really thought about what it really means to magnify God before. But it seems to me that it is the notion of magnification that gets us closer to why we come to God with our praise and worship.

What we magnify doesn’t actually get any larger, but it does to our eyes. It appears larger. Applied to God, this means that in magnifying God we do not, indeed cannot, add to God or enlarge him in any way. But what we do in magnifying God is we enlarge him in our own eyes, in our minds, and in our hearts and lives. Magnifying God is something we do because God deserves to be magnified. He deserves our adoration, our worship, and our praise.

There are many things in our lives that get magnified: personal troubles, financial struggles, health issues, family and relationship conflicts, and possessions. We call this blowing things out of proportion or making mountains out of molehills. We are all prone to doing this. I do this, and I suspect none of us is immune to magnifying lots of things in our lives—we’re all guilty of making various things appear larger than they are in reality.

But when we do this, one thing—someone—often gets reduced in size: God. Sometimes God ends up looking pretty small to us and ends up being small compared to everything else going on around us and in us. Cares and circumstances reduce God to a bit player in our lives, when not only is he supposed to be the major player in our lives but the director of our lives.

Or maybe God gets de-magnified in another way. Over the years sometimes we grow pretty familiar with church routine. We’ve heard all the hymns and praise songs, so we end up singing them by rote. We’ve heard sermons countless times, it seems, and the pastor rarely brings something fresh to the pulpit. The significance of the Bible stories we read lessen in impact because of repetition. And perhaps some of us as a result have reduced God to being no bigger than our experience of church.

God is already infinitely larger and greater than we can ever hope or imagine or understand. But he doesn’t always seem that way to our eyes. By proclaiming his greatness, his wonderful deeds, and his awesome character, by lifting our praises heavenward with expectant hearts, he will be magnified; that is, our perception of him will enlarge to better reflect who he really is. I also found this quotation on magnifying God, which I think is great. There's not much I can really add to it (though on Sunday I'll try!):

“Devout Christians are not exempt from not realizing the greatness of God. They may love the Lord and serve Him faithfully yet be so overwhelmed by their circumstances and fail to see that God is bigger. Magnifying God means seeing his greatness and superiority over every aspect of our lives. It means seeing God as being greater than any obstacle or challenge that comes our way. Magnifying God means proclaiming God's greatness and superiority over every aspect of our lives. God is magnified through praise for it proclaims his greatness and mighty acts (Ps 86:12, 13). Praise magnifies God in our eyes by reminding us of what he has done (Ps 107). It is the magnifying glass through which we see God's greatness. A magnifying glass does not make anything bigger that it really is but only magnified in our eyes (perception). In like manner, God is already great and magnified in the universe but through the magnifying glass of praise, so to speak, he is magnified in our eyes (perception) as well."

And, really, magnifying God is almost synonymous with praising God. In fact, until this week it never really occurred to me to think of magnifying God as anything other than a synonym for praising God. But for me the penny dropped when I realized that having God magnified is the result of our praise and worship and ought to be one of the reasons and motivations for our worship. And so all of the questions I had about praise -- like, why do we do it? -- were essentially answered. For some of you, this insight may not be new, but for me it feels pretty fresh. I just never thought of it this before. All I can say is that I found myself feeling quite grateful for how God helped me see this.

So, let me ask you: in what ways do you find God reduced in your eyes? How do you magnify God in your life? Does your experience of praising God in worship enable you to magnify him? I'd love to hear anyone else's thoughts on this.

Vacation: Part One and a Half

We just got back from a week of vacation on Saturday evening. Though the week was humid and downright wet at times, we still enjoyed our time at the camp. I managed to finish a couple of books -- a rarity these days! -- and we played a couple of new games, Boggle Jr. and Therapy, a few times. As you can probably guess Boggle Jr. is a game we bought for us and our three-year old, while Therapy is purely fun for adults. Once Ella did join us, and she got bored much more quickly than we did! She returned to playing with dinkie cars.

We're no longer on vacation but last night (Sunday night) we arrived at my Mom and Step-Dad's for my Mom's birthday. We definitely wanted to give her a specific surprise gift in person (more on that later!). So we stayed the night too since today is a stat holiday and because I usually take Mondays off anyway. We don't get to see my folks as often so it's nice to visit and have a little more time with them. Even as I type, the rest of them are playing Boggle Jr. together. And in the background is the newest Barenaked Ladies CD, Snacktime, their first kids album. Ella loves it! It's one of those rare kids albums that doesn't exhaust a parent's patience after the first or second listen.

We do have some more vacation time coming right after Baptist Convention Assembly (now called Oasis: Refreshment for the Journey). While this past week was nice, that will be the real vacation; we'll have two weeks that includes three Sundays off. Since the fall will be busy, I know our vacation will be much needed.

One of the things I mentioned to my in-laws while visiting with them this past week at their camp is that in my experience it takes time for vacation to set in. That is, it is easier to be on vacation physically than mentally. While I can be at the camp (or wherever) my mind can sometimes still be on work related matters. This is especially true since the line between ministry and personal faith is not always easy to separate. That's a topic for another time, however. So I pray that I will be able to truly get away: body, heart, mind, and soul. And I'm just grateful for times of rest, when I can take off my watch and kick back. I'm grateful that God has provided us with seasons in more ways than one.